Day 1, Cycle 4

Well so far so good, I am bored to tears, it is 12:53 and the ifosfomaid isn't done yet.  Been here for 3.5 hours already.

Well, one of the good things is that the Emend that I used to have to get a prescription filled for is now available as an IV liquid.  That is a good thing, because my deductible on it was $25 for THREE pills.  Thank God for insurance!!  If I didn't have it the cost would have been $375 for three pills.  And yes they are worth every penny.  It helps stop the nausea and vomiting.  Trust me, if you every went through chemo and experienced it, you'd pay just about anything to make it stop.  Better to prevent it.

My chemo schedule is 5 days on (not counting weekends) and two weeks off (again not counting weekends).  So Nov. 28th I'll be here, and Dec. 19th.  Yeah me.  My Christmas gift this year is my chemo ending on Dec. 23. 

I am afraid that my Christmas baking is going to suffer, but maybe not.  We will see.  You never know.

My white count was down today, 3.2.  Not enough for them not to go on with the chemo, but a full point lower than the last time.  The nurse questioned it, and I told her that I had just finished up radiation on the first, which explains the drop.

The very first treatment on Feb. 14 (didn't I get the best Valentine's Day gift?) I felt fine.  Right now I feel a little fuzzy around the edges.  I'm not sure if that is a good thing. The dosage is suppose to be reduced.  Didn't react all that well to them the first go round.  Hell, the second day I am taking an ambulance ride to the hospital.  Shit, I rode in an ambulance several times between February and May.  Let's hope that doesn't happen again.

One of the patients had a reaction to a drug, difficulty breathing.  The staff here at Hematology Oncology Associates of Fredricksburg took it in stride, reacting with calm, and getting the patient comfortable and able to breath normally.  Now I know how the other patients felt when I crashed and was hauled out on my second day.  But it is nice to know that the staff here know their job, and emergencies are dealt with swiftly and calmly.  Their calm flows over to the other patients.

I wanted to go to Costco to pick something up after this but I think I'll just go home and sleep off the fuzzy headed feeling.  Maybe I can con someone into going and picking it up for me.

What sucks is I have no vacation time left, and if I miss a day of work, I don't get paid.  Sucks eggs in a closet.  If I miss 8 days in a row I qualify for short term disability, but that is 8 days no pay.  Don't know about you, but my paycheck is my life line.

That is one thing Cancer patients all share, cost.  Even with insurance, and THANK GOD I have some the costs can get out there.  Just to give you an idea, every week I do chemo it is $200,  Every walk into the doctor's office is $40.  Which isn't much unless you keep repeating the visits,  Not to mention the prescriptions. 

So why did I say something about the cost?  Just to give you an idea, so if you know someone who is going through medical treatment and venting.  Let them vent please.  It can be very depressing to some.

In 2003 my insurance ran out and I had to make choices, like do I visit the doctor and get the CT scan or do I save the money and pay the mortgage.  Yes it gets to that point for some people, and no I am not at that point.  I just want people to be a bit more understanding for people with major medical issues when it comes to funds.

Yes, there are grants and help available but you have to search and find it, so for some people if you spend a bit of time searching, it could be a great help to them.

Unfortunately, some of the cancer stuff is very specific as to the type of cancer, mine is rare so there isn't anything out there.  But like I said, right now I am OK, and I think things will be alright. 

But there are other people out there people with cancer, heart problems, lung, major medical issues that are choosing do I pay the rent or get treatment?  Do I buy food or medicine? 

HELL, many senior citizens are faced with that type of choice, many veterans, and that my friends is a fucking shame.

So here is my holiday season challenge for you.  All the grocery stores seem to be doing the buy a bag thing and donating it to food banks, so buy a bag.  If all you do is donate $5 every shopping trip you will make a huge difference.

You can do the same for  homeless shelters, animal shelters, you name it.  Pick four charities that speak to you, one for each week of the month and donate $5.00, hell donate only one dollar, it is all the little donations that add up to BIG miracles!!!  Be a part of a big miracle!

Just remember the little pennies add up to dollars, and the dollars add up to thousands and the thousands add up to millions, but that doesn't happen without your help to start it.

Please help others this season.  Even if it is only a dollar at a time.